Different tasks require different tools.
Often, I get teased by my wife because of my need for just one more tool! Once I get the sought-after tool, it’s not long before I need yet one more tool!
Having the right tool is the reality for me because I continually find myself in front of some house project or have a woodworking project requiring a specific tool.
I think we have all tackled a project without the right tools to save some money, and it often ends up taking 4x as long and anything but satisfying.
My mantra for years has been, “It is all about the right tool!”
Parents also need tools in their toolbox.
Parenting is very similar to taking a project that requires the right tool.
Parents always face new challenges, and we have used our tools but to no avail. The behavior doesn’t change, and the heart behind the behavior gets worse rather than better.
My hammer cannot help me cut away a hand-cut dovetail for the drawer I am making. It takes a fine, surgically sharp chisel to slice through the hard maple wood.
Like the drawer, grounding your child for two weeks because of the repeated disrespectful talk cannot change his attitude. Perhaps grounding is not the right tool.
Finding the right tool for parenting is challenging.
What complicates the challenges of parenting is the infinite, complex moving variables. Those variables include chronological and developmental age, outside influences out of our control, your and your child’s attachment styles, personality differences, and on it goes.
We do the best that we can with the tools and time available. While striving to do better, we need to lend ourselves some grace.
Most parents will do anything to connect with their teen or go back when there were hugs, kisses, and story-time on our laps.
We cannot go back in time. But we can redeem the time we have.
Find the right tools for your parenting needs.
I am a Trust-Based Relational Intervention (TBRI) practitioner who focuses on attachment to bring healing to families and children with challenging behaviors.
Is it time for you to gain more tools to get the job done?
Call me for a free 20-minute consultation to begin today!